I haven't written in quite a while. Lots of new changes have happened since I last posted. Since I don't feel like reading over my past posts to see where I left off, I may repeat a few things.
First, We were going for a house that was supposed to close on the 25th. We ended up rescinding our offer. On top of being jerked around by those people, their listing agent was completely unethical, unprofessional, and possibly even a bit on the illegal side (I'm not so sure about it, if it isn't illegal, then it should be). He started calling our bank to see if we had the finances to go higher on price. Thankfully our bank respected our privacy and told him to bug off. Since that house fell through, we have been on the hunt for a new place. Last weekend we put an offer on a beautiful and perfect house for us, but for reasons other than financial, the owner went with the client of an agent she knew. We then turned around and put an offer on my other first choice house and the couple accepted our offer. So far this house has been a breeze to work with and the owners seem exceptionally nice. We are still waiting for the earnest money back from the first house. This could make or break whether or not we actually get this house. We're praying hard, not only because we can really use the money, but also because we don't want to have this go any farther (as in no lawyers and whatever). It's frustrating and discouraging, but we are encouraged by this other house and its owners.
Second, we have moved out of our apartment and in with the in laws. The reason was to save money and be able to put more towards the house. I also didn't want to keep jerking around our land lord, because I am just a really nice person. I work really hard to keep my promises and I felt that going back and trying to work things out would make me look like a flake. I also understand that they need to be able to know how to plan for things.
Anyways, we got all moved out, go the apartment cleaned up and looking better than when I moved in there. It was beautiful and I was sad to leave it, though still hopeful and excited about becoming a home owner. The down side to all of this is that my in laws came over to help pack up a few extra things and now I don't know where anything of value is. It frustrates me and stresses me because I like things to be organized. When I pack boxes, I can pretty much tell you what is in the boxes. Now, I have no idea and I'm already stressed about unpacking all these boxes because there's no organization to them. It will make unpacking take MUCH longer, and we won't be able to unpack based on priority.
The dynamics of living with the In Laws has been incredibly stressful to me. Emotionally, I have sunk into a state of depression. If you look at me wrong or use an annoyed tone, I burst into big, fat tears! No matter how hard I try, it's really difficult to stop crying once I get started. All of this is incredibly abnormal to me. I'm constantly frustrated and stressed that I'm not even talking as much as normal. I have to watch the words that come out of my mouth pretty closely, for fear of being offended or being disciplined like a small child. I have to work hard to actually parent my own child and to establish that as my role in his life because the in laws want to take over. I constantly feel like I'm messing up, that I'm not good enough,and that I pretty much suck at life. Moving into my own house cannot come fast enough.
I'm working really hard at being a blessing. I've been cleaning a lot: doing dishes, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, etc. If a need presents itself, I fill it. Part of this is also out of boredom. I've also been taking my husband and son out for walks. The other day we walked 6-7 miles plus we walked around in Walmart. Keep in mind that we haven't done any real exercise in a long time. It was really refreshing and nice to get out as a family.
My son has been so good. He hasn't been allowed to take much of a nap in the last 4 days. He tries to but the family keeps their tvs on SO LOUD! It's loud enough that it's quite difficult to have a conversation. If I put him in his bed to give him the chance and he cries, the grandparents will go and get him up. My poor boy has really bright red dark circles under his eyes. Yesterday he took to falling asleep whenever he could. He fell asleep on the way to church (which is an hour) and he slept for 3 hours while we were at church, and then fell asleep during car rides when we continued our Easter trek to see my extended family who live 3 hours away. During all of this, my son hasn't been real grumpy. He still is pretty happy.
In the midst of all the life changes and this season, I hold onto the hope that this season will be a short one. The prediction is that (if all goes well) we will be in our new house before April is over. Our closing date is May 9th, three days before Mother's Day.
Here's to a REALLY SHORT SEASON and for EVERYTHING to work out WELL!
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